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My extracts from poetry.

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Post by electric_rhino Fri Aug 20, 2010 9:14 am

I'll post here some bits of poetry I wrote.
I started to write again for the contest but now I can't stop, I'm brainstorming all the time.

So, what do you think? Surprised


My brain wouldn’t take it anymore
Made me feel sick and made beg on the floor.
Made my lungs, brain and soul fight and inside war
Made the butterflies on my stomach burn and sore,

The light has become a reminder of you
And the night has become a waste of my everlasting youth
The stars sat on the sky just to watch my love walk by
The sun sets in on the morning to blew them out of the sight

When the end is upon us
And you try to run away
I'll be right behind you
Walking to catastrophe


Last edited by electric_rhino on Sat Aug 21, 2010 10:36 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Gretta Sat Aug 21, 2010 3:50 am

wooooow
this is AWESOME! :O :O Very Happy Very Happy
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Post by Krissy Sat Aug 21, 2010 5:57 am

awesome Very Happy

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Post by electric_rhino Sat Aug 21, 2010 8:42 am

thanks. I'm glad you like it Smile
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Post by mimi Sat Aug 21, 2010 10:27 am

its beautiful.. but sad! and like.. angry
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Post by Natt Sat Aug 21, 2010 11:54 am

I like it
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Post by electric_rhino Sat Aug 21, 2010 10:51 pm

Last night I cried myself to sleep,
Please leave the door open, so I get a glimpse.
Hoping that the ghost of you will give me a good night kiss,
Trying to fight this feeling because it's just a memory.

You were everything I needed, everything I wanted,
My smiles were yours and I couldn't stop running,
Every breath I took turned into part of the atmosphere,
and just moments later, I find myself free of fear.

I'll never forget the way you bite your lip,
and how when you're angry your hands automatically goes onto your hip,
the dimples when you smile happily,
the way you hold my hand when you walked next to me.

this is some of what I wrote today.
As you see, I'm still stuck at love. Embarassed
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Post by TheLastSongbird Sun Aug 22, 2010 1:04 am

Both of your poems are stunning, there's so much emotion in them. I love it when I find a poem or song about love that isn't superficial; these two have such depth to them.

When the end is upon us
And you try to run away
I'll be right behind you
Walking to catastrophe

This is gorgeous. It reminds me of I'll Find You <3
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Post by electric_rhino Sun Aug 22, 2010 8:49 am

TheLastSongbird wrote:Both of your poems are stunning, there's so much emotion in them. I love it when I find a poem or song about love that isn't superficial; these two have such depth to them.

When the end is upon us
And you try to run away
I'll be right behind you
Walking to catastrophe

This is gorgeous. It reminds me of I'll Find You <3

awwww, thank you.
I'm extrmely glad you like it.
And I don't know, I felt some of my poems were superficial, but now that you say that they're not, I guess it was just me. Surprised
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Post by electric_rhino Mon Aug 23, 2010 11:27 pm

I don't know, this sounds like someone's death, I don't know what I was thinking, I just write and write and this is what comes up.


You tell me you need me right now,
you cry on my shoulder as I surround you with my arms.
I tell you the moon will wash away the sorrow,
and bring a smile tonight.

My heart tells me to hold you, but my brain is shutting down,
my arms are a fortress to the pieces of your heart.
You tried to told me what hurt you with your eyes watered,
You tried to hold me closer but my soul is shattered.

Don't fade away while having you on my knees,
Tell me it's not you, tell me it's just a breeze,
My mind is flying somewhere far ahead,
somewhere where nothing harm you and you're with me once again.

I punch the ground to the harmony of a shout,
I pull you up as you lay on the ground,
I've never felt this way before, I can't take it anymore,
every tear falling is an unthinkable sore.
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Post by TheLastSongbird Tue Aug 24, 2010 3:28 am

I got the shivers reading that...it's beautiful, but with a haunting, melancholy feel to it. It's inspired me too, I really feel like writing a poem now, and an idea's just come to mind. Thanks for being inspiring, and keep posting your poems Very Happy
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Post by electric_rhino Tue Aug 24, 2010 9:11 am

wow, really? Very Happy
glad you like it Smile
yeeei. I bet it's going to be great Wink
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Post by electric_rhino Tue Aug 24, 2010 11:46 pm

This is the poem I'm least proud of. Too much anger.

Drag me down across the room,
give me a slap and it's your doom.
Touch my cheek, I kick your teeth,
Pull my hair and watch me bleed.

Our breathing gets so heavy, I can see a mist,
You bite me, fight me and stand tall against my fist,
I get scared, howl and break your wrist,
I can't keep fighting, but I will not desist.

The fight never seem to stop,
Not even when you pull me and hit my head against the wall,
You stand up, I'll make you crawl,
None of us will ever win on this everlasting brawl.
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Post by electric_rhino Fri Aug 27, 2010 8:56 am

You're somewhere in this darkness, but my eyes are too tired to see,
You can be the light that guides me, but right now, your shine is too dim.
I can feel your breath right behind me, but when I turn around you disappear,
I try to touch you, fight you, kiss you, but when I realize you left, my eyes offer a tear,
saying I'm sorry I didn't mean it, I'm sorry I wasn't here.

I would never leave, your kiss is just sublime,
Even though I miss the sun, the stars and everything I had once upon a time.
Just say when and I'll make a map out of stones,
Just tell me you need me and you'll never be alone.

The sun sets somewhere we can't see,
and the moon is waking up, from it's everlasting sleep,
the stars are dancing a symphony of wind in the sky,
and the planets are aligning, to make you smile. To make you sight.
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Post by electric_rhino Sun Aug 29, 2010 6:22 pm

please stop and don't make me cry,
because every bone in my body is shaking to the melody of your lies,
my mind is going on a journey that it's not ready to embark,
and my eyes are so watered that they have become a permanent stain on my heart.

In my mind are racing the things I needed to say,
But my mouth is only echoing the prayers for you not to go away. I'm affraid.
I know now that there'll be no more chances for me to explain,
You're gone and there are only the tray of pieces of your heart that fell along the way.

I hold the walls around our souls,
but the roof is looming above our heads and you can't stop playing your role,
please help me, my arms are getting tired and my mind is holding this world,
you just keep trying but with your every move pain unfolds.

Everything came crumbling down,
you're on your knees crying and telling me it was all a waste, it was all in vain.
now let the tears come down like rain,
I won't hesitate, even thou my soul is in pain, even thou this body aches, even thou I know this rubble is all that will remain.
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Post by electric_rhino Thu Sep 23, 2010 3:53 pm

okay, so this a phrase I used on my cover letter, so I waited 'till mimi anouced the winner (my favorite won BTW) to post it. I think I put my exact feelings about love on this lines:

love is choice, and that choice is biased by the whispers of your mind that speaks through the experience of your past, the emotions of the present and the longings of the future.

what do you think? c:
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Post by Iridescent_Revival_<3 Thu Sep 23, 2010 10:50 pm

ooh ooh ooh can i pretty please write your poems in my book that i got today!? (not sure what to call it yet cos it'll have both lyrics and poems, and maybe some quotes lol it has glitter all over it so i might just call it my glitter book)

these are all seriously amazing. you put so much heart and emotion into everything you write. your words just tug at my heart and force me to give in to that intense emotion, pulling me into a different world. so beautiful!! keep posting Smile

<333
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Post by electric_rhino Fri Sep 24, 2010 7:54 am

Iridescent_Revival_<3 wrote:ooh ooh ooh can i pretty please write your poems in my book that i got today!? (not sure what to call it yet cos it'll have both lyrics and poems, and maybe some quotes lol it has glitter all over it so i might just call it my glitter book)

these are all seriously amazing. you put so much heart and emotion into everything you write. your words just tug at my heart and force me to give in to that intense emotion, pulling me into a different world. so beautiful!! keep posting Smile

<333

SHUT UP!
you have one too?

Well mine's minus the glitter, but I write things that make me feel something, put pictures, images, tickets, anything.
Glad you like them. I have like three other poems, but I'm editing 'em still.

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Post by electric_rhino Fri Sep 24, 2010 7:54 am

drr. and yeah btw c:
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Post by electric_rhino Sun Sep 26, 2010 8:43 pm

I thought that falling in love would be this fairy tale story,
Kept dreaming every night, like I girl waiting on a balcony.
The moment you looked into my eyes I knew,
That all my aspirations were about to become true.

The first time you held my hand,
something inside me fell apart and build up,
And when you kiss my lips as I close my eyes,
I can swear girl, the chemicals react.

something I came up on my way home.

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Post by Guest Thu Dec 02, 2010 7:43 am

awesomenessssssssssssssssssssssssssss Very Happy

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Post by electric_rhino Sat Jan 08, 2011 9:45 pm

i sit here in this empty space,
staring at the woods as your memory dry my mind of every bit I ever got to save,
i can feel your presence taking over my passion,

i can leave a trace of blood,
i can leave my town, my friends, I can leave my family and this house as disaster storms and flood.
i can leave my restraint and my faith,
but don't ever ask me to left my soul, to absorb your disgrace, to let my integrity be replaced.

I'll jump and put my fist up in the air,
i'll kick, i'll scream and fight to get saved,
leave this body as I get to the next,
and chase the world until the voice that was put down it's heard.

I still have my love to save me from the doom,
I still have this power to fight the world as every person resign over it's fate, as we together hold our hands and start this war.

i won't repent over what I've done,
i'll stand by my choices as the wounded soldiers moan
I won't kneel to your guns, they only bring more hurt,
I'll say my prayers, my voice breaks,
lying in the ground as blood and tears met,
I won't shut up, I won't regret
everything I've done, will be vanished but never forgot
not even as I lay dead, as I get rot.
as this words echo in your head, even tough I didn't put up a fight, I fought.
I tought army of love was going to be like this; I was still pleasanty surprised thou. Smile
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