Things In Marys Head

by MaryCourage Mon Jun 20, 2011 9:40 am

Yes. In my head. alien

You know. I'm just gonna make some blogpost here now and then. It's probably gonna contain everything from complaints to happy posts about my cat.

1
What was I thinking?
My hair is so, so thin atm. and my hair is normally really, really thick.
so...I guess I've got to cut it all of, and stop coloring it. damn. Sad

I am thinking about buying lots of wigs instead. That's probably better, since I change haircolor every other month. I mean come one,
since September last year I've had:
Black
Brown
Red with purple bangs
Blondish
Pink
Yellow
and not it's white.
and I had the red/purple for over 4 months.

I only have myself to blame. Stupid little me.

by MaryCourage Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:07 pm

Ok, so.
I'm really tired. but I wanted to write something.

I've been sick for the last week, and because of that, I haven't been able to do some workout. And now...I feel so fat. nfsngaggs
It's not good to feel this way just because I haven't exercised for a week. >_< I really, really shouldn't work out tomorrow, I don't want to hinder my recovery but I want to so bad. I need to loose more weight, so not happy with myself.

Just wanna 'blaaf' all over this post.

by javieljones Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:19 pm

I don't have too much advice for you on your hair XD Mine has always been really dark purple, brown, or black so I've never messed with bleaching before. But the wig thing sounds like a good deal. Change it up every day without worry Razz

Hope you feel better soon!

by MaryCourage Thu Jun 23, 2011 12:35 pm

You guys NEED to check this guy out!!

https://www.youtube.com/user/garrethdavis
He's so darn good.
Can't stop listening to his songs!! so good!!

Ok. so HAIRUPDATE:
I booked an appointment at the hairdresser today, so next Thursday, I'll chop it all off.
Which is so sad, cause I really want to have long hair.. though the hair isn't going to grow much when it's this torn. : (( and it's really ugly too xD

maha

javieljones wrote:I don't have too much advice for you on your hair XD Mine has always been really dark purple, brown, or black so I've never messed with bleaching before. But the wig thing sounds like a good deal. Change it up every day without worry

Hope you feel better soon!

Oh I know, I suck at bleaching, I blame it on the unusually strong bleach. D:::
I've already found some great looking wigs on ebay, it's only the money I need now!

by MaryCourage Fri Jun 24, 2011 4:50 am

THIS is what I've been watching for the last 15 minutes.
IT'S SO ANNOYING. but I can't turn if off.
badger badger badger badger badge badger badger badger badger badger badge badger MUSHROOM MUSHROOM.
ooooh it's aa snaaaake.

by MaryCourage Wed Jun 29, 2011 2:32 am

So nervous today.
We've been practicing for a little over a week for this theater. It's about our town, it sounds so boring, but my town celebrates a 100 years this year. So we're doing a play about it.. outside, and it's SO HOT! We're supposed to look like we lived in 1911, so I'm wearing a long thick skirt with 3 layers, and a long sweater with a vest over that. and it's been so damn hot these past few days. I'm DYING!! Can't believe people dresses that warm in the summers. *shakes head*

Then..we have another segment, where I'm supposed to look like a 70's girl.. I have to wear the ugliest, unflattering dress ever, it's green, and it clings to my body ugh, so horrible. D:: I loove retro fashion, 30's, 40's, 50's and 60's fashion that is!. But the 70's.. no, just no. So all my friends are wearing these really pretty dresses from the 50's and 60's.. so darn gorgeous and me.. *cries*

it's actually not that bad. I'll survive, but blah. I'm so jealous

by EetuJaKeijut Wed Jun 29, 2011 2:54 pm

Ahaha 70's and 80's fashion is something that doesn't really hit to me. Early 1900's is lush though <3

I get your hair problem. I pretty much killed my hair by bleaching it from pitch black to white x'D Not so wise i know, but i had to. It took me six months to get my hair right and now it's thick and nice again Very Happy

I weared wig for most of the time, you can see it in my ava. You just need truckload of good conditioner! And wig. Razz

Don't tell anyone but i'm going to bleach my hair little bit again.. I want green hair Razz

by MaryCourage Wed Jun 29, 2011 3:42 pm

I know, I'm gonna buy lots of wigs, long ones! Razz

They cost a bit though. :/
The worst is not that it's short.. I'm going to quit dyeing my hair now and I don't wanna bleach it, so I'm going to grow back my normal color.. but gaah, my color only looks good on long hair, when it's a bit sunbleached.. but short? no thank you.

6

Having one of those horrible moments.
Saw pictures of myself from the play we did. and I totally broke down. I look horrible, fat and ugly. I need to lose those extra 10 kg, I hate them. I feel like I'm not good enough for anyone whilst looking like this. I mean, who would ever like the ugly chubby chick?
I don't need to get into one of those rant were I complain about myself for 10 pages. So I'm gonna stop here. just uugh.

by MaryCourage Thu Jun 30, 2011 3:23 am

I feel like I'm falling apart again. i just barely patched myself up, and now I gotta ruin it all.
It's just..
It's been awhile since I last felt like this.
I know where it originated from, it's those looks.... that people give you that screams "stop talking, I'm not listening" "oh, why does she even talk to me?" "So annoying, just get out of here" I get them from everyone, my 'friends', my family. I can't take it.
MY sister and her boyfriend they invite my other younger brothers to go bowling with them, they all go on trips together, but I am NEVER invited, they don't even think of me. and that one time, when they had a trip planned, my brother had to work, so they "had a spot open" My sis boyfriend asked if I wanted to come, and the look on my sister face, and she even said it. "no, I thinks it's best if we go another day when HE' S free. "
It was months ago, but it still stings.

I feel so fucking worthless. Like I'm too ugly to even like, you know.
Maybe people would like me if I was good looking, thin, beautiful? Maybe then they'd not see my ugly personality.
I just scratched the hell out of my arms. Maybe not such a good ide now when I think of it. It did help ease the pain though. stupid me

by lyndseyjoy Thu Jun 30, 2011 4:36 am

Never say that you are worthless! Smile

you're worth way more than nothing. you wouldn't be here right now if you
were worthless.

I feel the same way as you sometimes. It hurts. a lot.
personally, I think you're beautiful. anyone who doesn't would have to be
crazy.. or blind. Razz

As for the scratching, I know that its hard for people to understand.
it doesnt mean that you're ruining your life, or whatever. or that you are suicidal, like most people think. I understand that it helps relieve stress. I do think that there are better things you could do for that, other than harming yourself though. You're beautiful, and don't deserve those marks on your body. Stay strong, Mary. Smile

everything will work out the way it's meant to, in the end.

by EetuJaKeijut Thu Jun 30, 2011 6:13 am

The thing that sucks the most is that if you tell the people who are ignoring you are going to say you are attention whore etc. It's so sad, it used to be like that with my old 'friends'. Those people were children of my mothers friends so they kinda had to take me with them, even as they didn't want to. So it all went exactly like that.
The thing is, you need friends that appreciate you for who you are. It doesn't matter how you look like (even though i think your really pretty!), real friends don't care for things like that. You just have to find them, i found people who understood me, even with my million flaws and i didn't feel so left out anymore Smile

And as sure as hell there are people like you, take this forum as a example. It just sucks we all live so far away haha!

And about your earlier post. I always react like that when i see photos of myself taken by others, especially when i don't know it's taken and i can't pose/fix my face. I do hope for us both feelings like that go over, feeling ugly makes you feel so so worthless. At my worst points i don't want to leave the house Very Happy

Oh and helvete don't scratch! I used to scratch the hell out of my arms and it was treated for year as serious arm injure :/

*hug*

by mimi Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:01 am

what are you talking about, Mary? You are gorgeous! I wish i had your eyes. people always look at themselves really critically but the reality is - people who want you for your appearance will come and go. people who want you for YOU are the ones worth the trouble and the wait.

Smile

by MaryCourage Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:55 pm

lyndseyjoy wrote:Never say that you are worthless!
you're worth way more than nothing. you wouldn't be here right now if you
were worthless.

I feel the same way as you sometimes. It hurts. a lot.
personally, I think you're beautiful. anyone who doesn't would have to be
crazy.. or blind.

As for the scratching, I know that its hard for people to understand.
it doesnt mean that you're ruining your life, or whatever. or that you are suicidal, like most people think. I understand that it helps relieve stress. I do think that there are better things you could do for that, other than harming yourself though. You're beautiful, and don't deserve those marks on your body. Stay strong, Mary.
everything will work out the way it's meant to, in the end.

Thank you <3 I feel a bit better now.I think I needed to vent and to get my mind of things.
The scratching isn't that bad, honestly. It rarely happens. (though it's bad enough!) My sister suffers from a lot of mental illnesses, and she's been cutting herself (real deep ones *shudders*) for 8 years. So..naturally I don't think the scathing is that bad. Though I'm going to try my hardest to stop, cause I don't wanna end up like her, with hundreds of scars on my arms.

EetuJaKeijut wrote:The thing that sucks the most is that if you tell the people who are ignoring you are going to say you are attention whore etc. It's so sad, it used to be like that with my old 'friends'. Those people were children of my mothers friends so they kinda had to take me with them, even as they didn't want to. So it all went exactly like that.
The thing is, you need friends that appreciate you for who you are. It doesn't matter how you look like (even though i think your really pretty!), real friends don't care for things like that. You just have to find them, i found people who understood me, even with my million flaws and i didn't feel so left out anymore And as sure as hell there are people like you, take this forum as a example. It just sucks we all live so far away haha!

And about your earlier post. I always react like that when i see photos of myself taken by others, especially when i don't know it's taken and i can't pose/fix my face. I do hope for us both feelings like that go over, feeling ugly makes you feel so so worthless. At my worst points i don't want to leave the house

Oh and helvete don't scratch! I used to scratch the hell out of my arms and it was treated for year as serious arm injure :/

*hug*

<33
I have one friend that I can truly trust, I can be myself around her cause she doesn't mind my weird humor.
yeah the best people can be found on the internet, it sucks when you live far apart. D:: The people here on ToL really are amazing! I've never had such a warm welcome from any other board.

mimi wrote:what are you talking about, Mary? You are gorgeous! I wish i had your eyes. people always look at themselves really critically but the reality is - people who want you for your appearance will come and go. people who want you for YOU are the ones worth the trouble and the wait.

thank you <3 Actually my eyes are the only thing on my that face I feel good about.
My 'therapist' tells me I'm way to hard on myself, the thing is that I feel like I'm being rude if I like myself. It's weird I know. I'm working on it though, and I'm way more outgoing and happier than ever before. (not today maybe, but otherwise Razz

)

by MaryCourage Thu Jul 07, 2011 1:45 pm

Fun one.

(needed)

Since I didn't get a real job this summer, the 'commune' (or whatever you say in English) gave me a "job" hehe. This year, I chose Theater, so basically what we do these four weeks, is play. We've done some serious things, like rehearse for the play we did yesterday, (in which I wore the HORRIBLE clothes *vomits*)
yesterday was the funniest day ever!! We dressed up in 1800/1900 clothes and went to a park in our city and played croquet, while we spoke in fail British accents. everyone else looked splendid in their lovely clothes, I was a maid ( >_> ), and the rich people bossed me around all the time. (I would NOT want to be a maid. gosh horrible xD) We ended up getting lots of publicity, 3 news papers included us, people photographed like crazy. and WOAH, people stared. obviously. some people even welcomed us to Sweden, and wished us a pleasant stay. (We still don't know if they were serious, they sure seemed to believe us though. "Does all English people dress like this?" lulz <3

Standing there looking depressed. xD
Things In Marys Head Maaid11

Can't belive I'm getting paid to play games xD

by mimi Fri Jul 08, 2011 1:35 am

haha that looks so awesome!!! Smile

i miss my drama class so much Sad

but im gonna start doing everything theatre in the university Very Happy

so... YAY lol

by lunachild Fri Jul 08, 2011 10:34 am

That is sweet! Personally I'd like to be the maid that brings the food and drink so that I could leave little... eh-hem... surprises in them! I know its sort of mean, but hey! That was probably real life what some servants did!

by MaryCourage Mon Jul 11, 2011 12:19 pm

mimi wrote:haha that looks so awesome!!!
i miss my drama class so much but im gonna start doing everything theatre in the university so... YAY lol

It was so much fun.
oh really, that sounds awesome. : ))

lunachild wrote:That is sweet! Personally I'd like to be the maid that brings the food and drink so that I could leave little... eh-hem... surprises in them! I know its sort of mean, but hey! That was probably real life what some servants did!

hahaha, I should have done that. mowhahah Wink

----
I'm so tired atm,lots of stuff has been going on today. And I haven't eaten/drunk enough today. I feel a bit faint.
I bought some pills that'll supposedly make your hair and nails stronger, and hopefully help my hair grow faster. (yeey)

by lunachild Mon Jul 11, 2011 12:51 pm

MaryCourage wrote:I'm so tired atm,lots of stuff has been going on today. And I haven't eaten/drunk enough today. I feel a bit faint.
I bought some pills that'll supposedly make your hair and nails stronger, and hopefully help my hair grow faster. (yeey)

For the tired and no eating/drinking enough, I know how you feel. I just get so caught up in stuff that I can't stop and think "Oh, I need water" or "Get food" and then all of a sudden I feel so tired and faint.

by MaryCourage Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:00 pm

^ Yeah, My bloodsugar is a bit low sometimes, everytime I've stood up I've gotten really dizzy today.
But next week I think I'm going to go and buy some vitamins, I'm in need of C-vitamins, B-Vitamin (Could easily get that if I'd drink milk, but bleeh it's so gross) and other stuff. People always warned me to eat vitamins when I became a vegetarian, but I always thought that I didn't need them. Obviously I do, since I've been sick 6 times this year already.

by MaryCourage Tue Jul 12, 2011 1:01 pm

Today, I went on a shopping trip with my mom, we stopped at two Second Hand stores, and I found these INCREDIBLY AWESOME clothes. Like, I love them so, so much :3

These pants. <3333 (and the awesome 90's top.
Things In Marys Head Tumblr_lo8kgtU3We1qh38pco1_500

Things In Marys Head Tumblr_lo8kgtU3We1qh38pco1_500

This skirt was brand new. also really pretty. ;D
Things In Marys Head Snapsh10

I bought a few tops to. But I'm not gonna post pics of them on me. Too much skin showing xD

oooh I love buying awesome clothes. I feel so pretty then. :3

by lunachild Tue Jul 12, 2011 3:31 pm

Very cute items of choice!!!

by MaryCourage Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:29 pm

haha thanks Smile

I have a thing for yellow, if you haven't noticed xD

10.

This song on repeat atm,
Everytime I listen to it I feel like I'm floating on a big fluffy cloud. High.
Amys voice is like heaven <3

by Natt Wed Jul 13, 2011 9:18 am

your clothes are the best
you have so good that you can wear what you want
in poland we can't
I love this song

by MaryCourage Fri Jul 15, 2011 12:33 pm

^hehe thank you. It's not that bad where I live. (Or maybe it is, I just never notice if people talk or says stuff about me.) Razz

Feeling myself gushing over writing and recording new songs.
The thing is I have all these visions of how it's going to sound, but I can never complete it just the way I want it to be. :/ I want my music to be atmospheric, dark, beautiful, mysterious, meaningful.. FUN.. an with that It doesn't necessarily mean a pop song with beats and lyrics about dancing and stuff ( Razz

) more fun in a way that... it's not depressing when you listen to it xD

well, I'm off to record some more. if my studio/computer will let me. It has been a B**** lately. D::

by MaryCourage Fri Jul 15, 2011 2:43 pm

ooh yesterday I recoded a cover of a song that I loooooove
Understanding by Evanescence!

-Dunno if I this is the place to put it but whatevers it's ma blog! ;D

Yeah. :3

by MaryCourage Thu Jul 21, 2011 3:50 pm

Thinking about being bad, and dye my hair in a Teal color.
doing a pros/cons list now!

Pros:
- it looks GOOOOOOD
- I will be fab again.
- feels more like myself
- don't need to bleach the hair before,
- if I use stargazer it'll fade naturally, good color yes!

Cons:
- Damages hair..alot
- I want to grow my hair out, to my normal color. (even though that's boring D:)
- I could get wigs.. they don't damage the hair.

buhu. thinking about this huurts. Dx
I waant it so much.
though I want long teal hair.. more like Kerli had it. (or the way Gagas is,) LONG! my hair is short.
bllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh.
I should just invest in an really good wig instead. but where do you get one that looks legit, and isn't going to make me go bankrupt!

by Krissy Thu Jul 21, 2011 6:28 pm

nice outfits.You should dye your hair if ya like.

i got some summer stuff at my second hand store really cheap. Very Happy

by MaryCourage Sat Aug 13, 2011 7:09 am

^ maha, thank you Razz

I'm slowly getting used to being blond again. x)

well... I know I've been off this board for quite some time.. and I really don't have a good excuse for it x) I guess I could 'blame' it on all the Evanescence stuff that's been happening, new stuff. I've been consumed about it. Breathing it really. :3 *Is a happy girl*
and now felt like a good time to "come back" here. I am glad to be back. Smile

Hope everyones fine and dandy ;D

hehe.. I absolutely LOVE the smylies on this board alien

When would you ever use these? xD they are cute though.

by Krissy Sat Aug 13, 2011 7:12 am

welcome back

by MaryCourage Sat Aug 13, 2011 7:17 am

Thank youuu : )))))

by Krissy Sat Aug 13, 2011 7:28 am

your welcome.nice to see you back.

by MaryCourage Sun Aug 14, 2011 6:30 am

Nice to be back Wink

humpf, someone asked me to do a cover of When You Cry
and I did something... not as good as my previous covers, I admit that.
but it's good enough :p

by mimi Sun Aug 14, 2011 8:40 am

your voice is out of this world.

by lunachild Sun Aug 14, 2011 9:39 am

OMG! That is amazing! Can I suggest a cover for Scar Tissue by Kerli?

by EetuJaKeijut Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:59 am

Wow must be the unity again, i was just recording the same song today haha Very Happy

But seriously, your voice is million dollars quality. If some big record company isn't going to discover you soon enough i'm going to start murdering people, your seriously so much better than most stuff on the radio at the moment.

Hug <3

by MaryCourage Sun Aug 14, 2011 2:14 pm

mimi wrote:your voice is out of this world.

thank you : ))

lunachild wrote:OMG! That is amazing! Can I suggest a cover for Scar Tissue by Kerli?

thanks

I shall look in to that! I really like doing covers of Kerlis song, hit me with suggestions please Very Happy

EetuJaKeijut wrote:Wow must be the unity again, i was just recording the same song today haha But seriously, your voice is million dollars quality. If some big record company isn't going to discover you soon enough i'm going to start murdering people, your seriously so much better than most stuff on the radio at the moment.

Hug <3

ooh, show it please : DDD
thank you, you're way too sweet, *big hug* <33

by joseph325625 Sun Aug 14, 2011 4:15 pm

You are an amazing singer. Like I don't know what else to say.
Your voice has left me speech less.
Keep up the good work!!!

by MaryCourage Sat Aug 27, 2011 1:23 pm

joseph325625 wrote:
You are an amazing singer. Like I don't know what else to say.
Your voice has left me speech less.
Keep up the good work!!!

thank you :3 Very Happy

15
I've been so off, this site. Too much happening.

I started my senior year last Tuesday. scary! D:
I feel like I have to put all my work in school this year. and I major in theater so this year we put up a huge play, we're getting our scripts on Monday and premiering the whole thing sometime in March.
We're playing "Fanny and Alexander" by Ingmar Bergman.
It's such a serious play, and I've never done that before, so that's both exciting and ...scary. I hope I get a bigger part in this one, I usually get the smaller once, because I am so shy. :s

and also, we have another project, which we have to do all by ourselves, and I don't know what I am going to do!!! I think I'm going to do a cd or something, maybe do a project about the differences between writing songs with your own lyrics, or writing for someone else's lyrics. but yeah, I have to talk to my teachers about that.

music... I love it so,so much. I've done some more covers lately, and I finally recorded a song that I wrote with a friend of mine. I'll post it here later, if anyones interested :p

by MaryCourage Mon Aug 29, 2011 2:23 pm

We got our scripts for the play today. 90 pages long. Pretty thick! Very Happy

:D:D I am so pumped for this. Like.. I can't explain. But it's going to be hard, we're going to have multiple hand-ins and essays about our characters, and I always sucked at stuff like that. It's good practice though. I hope I don't get a small part this time around. I don't want the biggest part either, cause I don't like the pressure to lead stuff you know.?!!
There is a good chance Ill get to play one of the children in this. Since I'm so small, and I don't mind, it would be Awesome!!!!!! Very Happy

so exciteeeeeddddd.. : DDDDDDDDDDDDDD

by Krissy Mon Aug 29, 2011 4:36 pm

yay.awesome

by Killjoychemicalchaos Tue Aug 30, 2011 9:11 pm

MaryCourage wrote:Ok, so.
I'm really tired. but I wanted to write something.

I've been sick for the last week, and because of that, I haven't been able to do some workout. And now...I feel so fat. nfsngaggs
It's not good to feel this way just because I haven't exercised for a week. >_< I really, really shouldn't work out tomorrow, I don't want to hinder my recovery but I want to so bad. I need to loose more weight, so not happy with myself.

Just wanna 'blaaf' all over this post.

You can dye your hair however whenever you want. BTW: Wigs are cool! I love wigs! You don't have to do anything but put them on and if you change your hair color a lot than that's perfect, Some of my friends have shaved half of their heads and dyed it so many times but you know they don't care, I don't care and it doesn't matter! Your beautiful no matter who you are! One of my friends was overweight had severe acne and was insecure so i told her to go to the mirror everyday and say something she liked about herself! Oppose to saying she was fat and talking about her problems, four months later she had lost twenty pounds just doing that! Her nails were long! And she looked gorgeous and wasn't upset! I had finally helped someone to feel better! So now i am inspired to help you! It dosn't matter if your overqeight I am and i still know that I am beautiful inside and out! A lot of my friends judge me and you know I just think that none of us are perfect. And you have to realize if someone makes fun of you for something like not being pretty it's a self projection! That's how they feel about themselves. And they are insecure and miserable and your happy and sweet! So what I'm getting at: Your beautiful, kind and nice inside and out flower

by MaryCourage Tue Aug 30, 2011 10:47 pm

Killjoychemicalchaos wrote:You can dye your hair however whenever you want. BTW: Wigs are cool! I love wigs! You don't have to do anything but put them on and if you change your hair color a lot than that's perfect, Some of my friends have shaved half of their heads and dyed it so many times but you know they don't care, I don't care and it doesn't matter! Your beautiful no matter who you are! One of my friends was overweight had severe acne and was insecure so i told her to go to the mirror everyday and say something she liked about herself! Oppose to saying she was fat and talking about her problems, four months later she had lost twenty pounds just doing that! Her nails were long! And she looked gorgeous and wasn't upset! I had finally helped someone to feel better! So now i am inspired to help you! It dosn't matter if your overqeight I am and i still know that I am beautiful inside and out! A lot of my friends judge me and you know I just think that none of us are perfect. And you have to realize if someone makes fun of you for something like not being pretty it's a self projection! That's how they feel about themselves. And they are insecure and miserable and your happy and sweet! So what I'm getting at: Your beautiful, kind and nice inside and out

thank you you're so sweet <3 I love that you're trying to help people, we need more people like you! :3
I still want to dye my hair, but it's too damaged, it'll fall of and die if I do it again x(

I don't know, I feel a lot better now. I've reached my first goal, so I'm "officially" normalweight now (according to bmi..) which is good, but I feel like.. If I'm going to be more comfortable in my own skin, I need to loose 8 more kilos. But now, I'm not as ashamed anymore. for a while there were days when I couldn't get out of the house because I Felt like everyone would laugh at me, and talk about how I looked behind my back. (but no one did ofc,)
yeah.. there are good days and there are bag days. but it'll get better xD

on another note: I love your username. Very Happy

mcr <3

by MaryCourage Wed Aug 31, 2011 1:04 pm

Just thought I could post some of my recent covers here.
Feedback is always welcomed ;D

A Halestorm cover. Very Happy

aaand a Swedish song. x) it's 18:29-4 by Kent.

by Natt Thu Sep 01, 2011 5:00 am

I can't listen and I did mp3... I prefer song no 1
wonderful... I love your voice... honey you are so sweet

by Killjoychemicalchaos Thu Sep 01, 2011 11:10 am

MaryCourage wrote:
Killjoychemicalchaos wrote:You can dye your hair however whenever you want. BTW: Wigs are cool! I love wigs! You don't have to do anything but put them on and if you change your hair color a lot than that's perfect, Some of my friends have shaved half of their heads and dyed it so many times but you know they don't care, I don't care and it doesn't matter! Your beautiful no matter who you are! One of my friends was overweight had severe acne and was insecure so i told her to go to the mirror everyday and say something she liked about herself! Oppose to saying she was fat and talking about her problems, four months later she had lost twenty pounds just doing that! Her nails were long! And she looked gorgeous and wasn't upset! I had finally helped someone to feel better! So now i am inspired to help you! It dosn't matter if your overqeight I am and i still know that I am beautiful inside and out! A lot of my friends judge me and you know I just think that none of us are perfect. And you have to realize if someone makes fun of you for something like not being pretty it's a self projection! That's how they feel about themselves. And they are insecure and miserable and your happy and sweet! So what I'm getting at: Your beautiful, kind and nice inside and out

thank you you're so sweet <3 I love that you're trying to help people, we need more people like you! :3
I still want to dye my hair, but it's too damaged, it'll fall of and die if I do it again x(

I don't know, I feel a lot better now. I've reached my first goal, so I'm "officially" normalweight now (according to bmi..) which is good, but I feel like.. If I'm going to be more comfortable in my own skin, I need to loose 8 more kilos. But now, I'm not as ashamed anymore. for a while there were days when I couldn't get out of the house because I Felt like everyone would laugh at me, and talk about how I looked behind my back. (but no one did ofc,)
yeah.. there are good days and there are bag days. but it'll get better xD

on another note: I love your username. mcr <3

hhahahhahahhah MCR! Sweet! Yeah it really depends, I feel like that too somedays but than I just realize no one cares how I look!

by MaryCourage Fri Sep 02, 2011 2:37 pm

Killjoychemicalchaos wrote:hhahahhahahhah MCR! Sweet! Yeah it really depends, I feel like that too somedays but than I just realize no one cares how I look!

2:nd favorite band. they.rock!!! : DD
yeah, it took some time to realise that xD

KerliPoland wrote:I can't listen and I did mp3... I prefer song no 1
wonderful... I love your voice... honey you are so sweet

thank you darling :3

by MaryCourage Fri Sep 02, 2011 4:04 pm

Getting kinda tired, the clock is ticking by 1am. Should go to sleep.
but nooh xD

Been fangirl-ing over the new Evanescence songs. My faves are probably The Change..but The Other Side is also good. and oceans too. Ill never be able to pick a favorite. xD

wells....
If anyones interested (probably not xD) I've created an account on lookbook.
http://lookbook.nu/erasethesilence Its pretty awesome..noh not really

but you could do me a favor, perhaps? Very Happy

:D
I'm sumbited a song of mine to a youtube show that's called "Buck Factor" (the host is WhatTheBuck Razz

) anyways. If you want to you could like my post and maybe comment on it. (Im the girl with the pink hair!) It's called "Did You"
The thing is, they feature you if he likes it, and if other people share an interest in it.
Well thanks anyway Very Happy

heres the link btw --> https://www.facebook.com/buckfactor

by MaryCourage Sun Sep 04, 2011 1:42 pm

wooopaaah

hey guys. :3
Iamboored.
I was supposed to decide what my schoolproject was gonna be this weekend.. didn't do it.
can't decide. D:::

Either:
The difference between composing music for your own lyrics and for other peoples lyrics.

How to learn how to play the Key Harp (it's such a cool instrument)

write music for a play/book/series.

...I don't know... I need advice. Perhaps it has to have something to do with theater, since that's my major. damn.

by Natt Sun Sep 04, 2011 1:47 pm

aww your schoolprojects sounds wonderful. I understand that this is for you valid, and I think that you should listen to the voice of the heart.
Maybe try to analyze every topic (advantages and disadvantages) and choose the best. I believe in you Smile

by mimi Mon Sep 05, 2011 2:38 am

My advice would be always try to find links with something you know or have studied before. So if you're studying theatre definitely base this project on theatre as well. It will be much easier for you plus you can go into depth more and bring out some interesting points that people who have never participated wouldn't know.

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