wolfeh

Hi guys! So basically, I'm not going through the DARKEST of times right now (yay!), so this will just be a more casual thing I guess you could say.

So I've been struggling with keeping my voice strong and right ever since last October when I got hit with a really wicked case of mono. It just went away about a month and a half ago. Yeah, I know, WTH? I didn't know it could last that long either. It interfered with my interning/school program, I couldn't go out and hang with my friends, walking to the mailbox was a huge trial. It just wasn't cool. Anyhow, finally out of the woods with that bullocks now. Have any of you ever had any crazy illness crap like that happen? Please, share if so. I want to discuss in here. Not just be me typing alone lol.

So that brings us to the second part of this I guess. I'm back at my intern site and I swear, I feel so much as I've bitten off more than I can chew with this career choice. It's like trying to fit an antler into your mouth. The doctor's (while nice, and patient) expect you to know everything about everything when you start working there, even though you're a student, and that's just not making sense to me. School doesn't prepare you for everything. Anyhow, as someone with anxiety issues pretty bad, this has had me freaked for a few days now. But I guess that's healthy. I think it's when you start to rest on your laurels that the end is near. How are you kids doing? Everybody well? Not well? Fill me in.

I never really had a bad illness but after a surgery (what they did was insert a balloon thing in a main artery in the leg to the heart) I was on bedrest for a week because it kill to move my leg and when I did move it was stiff and difficult to walk with.

I guess my heart condition in general is a bitch, before surgery I wasn't allowed to do sports or play games for weeks!

Oh wow. That really sucks. Sorry to hear that. If you don't mind my asking, what's the heart condition you have/had? And yeah, being confined to a bed is maddening.

Oh and of course, are you better now? Can you play the sports and such? I really hope so!

I can play sport I just couldn't at the time because my blood pressure was too high. I have Bicuspid aortic stenosis (orginally was aortic valve)
I still have it, I need an open heart op to be somewhat normal.

Oh okay. If it's not too personal of a question to ask, do you plan on having that op?

Well I have to have it I guess, I just have to stop growing though which they estimate around 18-ish.

Ah, well that's not so long away. ^-^

Ahh good luck with your intern. I'm bit afraid of mine coming up next year, where ever i go they expect me to know everything and work fast and it's creepy! Well i do study graphic design so it isn't lethal or anything but it's embarassing for perfectionist like me haha.
How many years does your school last?

Thanks. Mine only lasted a few months. How about yours? And ah, graphic design; that's really cool.

Don't stress it, you will be just fine. Doctors feel the need to shove their degree into everyone face and act like everything is common sense to them. They forget that they where in your place at one point. Just stick with it, an internship looks really good once you're out there looking for a job.

I'm in a similar place, I'm a SMT and because I'm in the natural area of health clients expect you to know everything and how to heal them. I'm not in a place in my schooling where I have as much knowledge as my teachers, so when I can't help my client I feel horrible at the end of the day.

All I can say is stick it out, you will do just fine.

Thanks for the encouragement. And yeah, it certainly makes you feel bad when doctor's or patients make you feel inadequate. How much longer to go in your schooling? Do you realize how competitive and hostile the medical world can be before you started? I hadnt.

I'm supposed to have about 10 months left, it's an 18 month program but the teachers are trying to push us so we finish in 7-8 month. The medical world is competitive, but its one profession that will always be in constant need. But I think we are on different sides on the medical spectrum. With what I'm doing the more you know the better you can sell yourself; so I have to push myself to become more knowledgeable. My career relies on what I learn and how good I am. We also differ on the fact that we relie on others within our community for advice and guidance more frequently than doctors because it's all about ego in that world; no hostility in my world unless you count those street walkers staining our name and farfetched ideas.

What is the “mono”? I’m so sorry but I don’t know

I;m so sorry for it what you feel. I believe in you!!! Be strong, please

PS. When my Internet will be a normal=10th April ,it I will can see your MySpece and listen to your music

Claudia <3

@luis: So what exactly is it that you do? If you don't mind exposing that is. Another thing that greatly irks me is the majority of reg doctors having an upturned nose toward naturopathy. With any luck, I'll be working for my naturopathist within the year.

@Claudia: oh okay. So the web won't let you look? Well that's not good! Lol thanks for tryin to. I hope you like it when you can actually hear it. ^-^

*don't mind EXPLAINING. sorry, the autocorrect feature on this phone is maddening.

KerliPoland wrote:
What is the “mono”? I’m so sorry but I don’t know

I;m so sorry for it what you feel. I believe in you!!! Be strong, please

PS. When my Internet will be a normal=10th April ,it I will can see your MySpece and listen to your music

Claudia <3

K, well, mono (aka mononucleosis or Epstein-Barr virus) is a really nasty virus that feels a lot like the flu, but it's symptoms can be much more intense and it can last for many many months. And thanks for the encouragement! I worry way too much lol. How are you dear? I've noticed you give comfort to a lot of the Moon Children on here. That's really sweet.

I'm so sorry. I didn't knew....I hope that you will feel the better <3
I send all my love to you....
I don't feel to good and it an awesome family from TOL save me always <3

Yeah, people here are the best

Aw, you're such a doll! I'm hoping you are in health and happiness too and I too send much love. Everything okay on your end? Message me any time if you ever need a shoulder dear.

Thanks, but why I'm a doll??? I'm sorry but health and happiness to me is only dream.Thank for love <3 Isn't ok. Thank you <3

I love your avatar and signature <3

I'm sorry, is there not a similar saying there? It's like saying someone is sweet, caring, etc. I'm really sorry, hope everything becomes ok soon for you. And thank you!

Oh no, I don't mind "exposing" SMT stands for student massage therapist. I'm into herbs, aroma therapy, iridology, body work, ect. But I don't believe just everything within this field, you have to keep a clear head or you can be mislead into buying almost anything.

Ha, I almost went into that myself! Wow, I feel slow. I googled SMT and all it gave me was Soft Manual Therapy? lol. Oh okay, yeah, I've quite a few MT friends. ^-^ Love the herbs, aromatherapy, and iridology by the way.

Haha that's funny...

Really you almost when into massage therapy. Why the change, and also what are you goin for right now?

Idr really why the change. I know my dad was really against it for some reason. He's a good guy but has some "ugh" moments. Well I'm working as an MA but I'd like to either go for LPN or even just to strictly work in the labs doing bloodwork and such. And if this doesn't pan out? Who the hell knows. lol. Good to see more guys doing the massage therapy though. I've never seen one here at the spas and clinics and stuff. Though there were several at my school.

Do you have any plans in addition to the massage therapy? Or is this your staple?

It's tough for us guys, we have to be super careful we can easily get in trouble with clients. There are the guys who are too "tough" and homophobic, and also the women who are so self conscious they refuse to be touched by a man. Constant pins and needles, but the only thing I can do is aim to be the best. Massage therapy is gonna be the basic foundation but I plan on furthering myself in nutrition, herbology, possibly some veterinarian stuff but thats for my own personal knowledge, maybe physical therapy, so much more but just for the sake of knowledge. I repect what you do, but whatever you chose I hope everything works out well for you!

Thank you, and the same for you! Physical Therapy was another thing I opted out of. xD That one I actually regret opting out of though. And wow, yeah, I could see that easily being made unnecessarily awkward by clients. Men are stupid. As for the women? Eh. Idk. lol. One of the things we have to learn how to do while at the office is assisting during a pap smear.....what woman is going to let me just stand there? haha! I think that'd be very good to go into nutrition. Especially in this country. lol! (If you live in the U.S. that is. Gosh Americans eat garbage). So you're an animal lover then?

Hahah you really assit during a pap smear, wow thats really awkward. The worst I do is work glutes and really close mid thigh. <--- real problem with men! Oh I have stories to tell but I may be crossing client confidentiality lines. Nutrition is something very much needed here in the states, but I do confess I do love me some BBQ ribs and deep fried cheesecake bites.

Yes I am an animal lover, but it mostly towards dogs. They saved me emotionally, such loyal creatures.

Ah, that's all good stuff. I've been trying to eat healthy, but ribs? Oh hell yeah. All bets are off there. AND cheesecake? That's a marriage made in obesity. Yeah, i'd imagine the thighs being a bit.....interesting with men. lol. SPEAKING of confidentiality, one of the doctors I work for? Refuses to have the info on the charts facing the doors they rest in....so it's like every day, wake up, HIPAA violation! So dumb. You have any pets?

I love me my ribS mmmmmm.... Interesting isn't even the half of it many dirty story I could tell but this is ToL hahaha let's keep it clean. Same here almost everything is a freaking HIPPA violation its ridiculus. As for pets I personally own 2 dogs a jack russlle terrier/Labrador mix and a Labrador/Chow mix. But my family owns Chickens, turkeys, ducks, parakeets, cockateels and 2 other dogs such as German shepherd and a Doberman.

lol oh my. And aw! That's awesome. ^-^ I'm trying to picture a jack russel/lab mix lol. Aw, chow mixes ^-^

Im very self conscious so if I change my default pic I'll be sure to include my russle\lab (his name is rocky)

Ah ok. Is he your baby?

He is very special yes, been with me for 8 years so he's pretty much my child.

Aw, that's sweet. Is he your first that you really got attached to as yours?

Yeah he the first I can actually remember, we had one other but I have few memories of him. Ever since then I've been drawn to dogs, I love everything about them. Their loyalty knowns no bounds and some are really beautiful my favorite breeds are the Siberian husky, Australian sheperd, Border collie, black labs. Sometimes I wish I had a tail and dog ears hahaha

I'm assuming they've gotten you through some pretty bleak times then it sounds like? My cousin has a gorgeous Australian Shepherd. Great big blue eyes and this wonderful coat of auburns and white patches. Haha, had you the ears and tail, that would have to be your avatar!

Yeah they did, I will forever be a fan of the canines. Love Australian shepherds, e en more I love blue eyes. Hmm wolf ears and tail maybe I'll do a feral look for my avatar, and work in some bubblegoth. I feel strange talking about myself, this is your blog i feel like im taking your space tell us about you

lol, I'm enjoying it though. Do a feral look? Are we talking making some sort of hood or something to wear? hahaaaa bubblegoth. Ordering a respirator to bling out tonight. ^-^ And idk what to say about me lol. I've a shih tzu. Her name is Jia and she's this gorgeous, rotten, sweet little fire ball.

Hmm maybe some war paint, dog ears (?) , a hood w/ dog ears, wild beast hair, idk I want it dark yet with a touch light. Thats awesome, I have yet to master the creative spirit of changing everyday things into bubblegoth. Idk how I feel about small breeds, I love my dogs big and furry, like a giant plush pillow. I do like Pomeranians fun little things.

I was the same way. I miss my big dogs though. Had an ox sized dalmation (was pure bred and yet nothing like those pitiful little whimpy looking ones you usually see) and a beautiful husky/chow mix that was quite smart and extremely sweet. Miss having something big to hug lol. I wish I had that creative spirit too. I try, but I have to try really, really hard to pull crazy creative tricks out of the hat. Music? I'm fine with that. Just the visuals that are a struggle. lol a giant plush pillow is the best

I'm actually trying some "substitute" war paint as we speak you inspired me to create something. Creativity is really hard when it seems almost everything has been done. Kerli is my inspiration to push myself. An ox sized dalmation wow, I really love huge dogs I think my next will be a giant Alaskan malamute.

AW they're so cute! Love how they're, well, massive! lol substitute? Yay! Go! Create! I was vaselining metal studs to my eyebrows (ala ke$ha) yesterday lol. Needed something a little bizarre to see gaga this coming saturday. Settled on studs on face. It's really hard to do something new, especially with so many creative people on the earth.

Yeah I find that with the right layers ink can give a neat look. Metal studs! You should post some pics that sounds real sweet. As for the concert I plan on my first to be a Kerli one, sorry but my heart belong to Kerli solely, nothing against Gaga my views are the same as Kerli.

Wow, I'm surprised you've never been to one! Neither have a couple friends of mine. All in due time though. And Kerli's views? And I hope it does wind up sweet!

Oh and yeah, Kerli needs to tour the US soon, btw. lol. Cause that would be amazing.

Yeah my first was either gonna be a 30 seconds to Mars, or Evanescence one but I decided it will be a Kerli concert. She needs to tour real soon and I'll be one of the first to buy tickets. Well I don't really want to go all into that, but I believe overall she's a smart girl.

I hear 30stm is great live. Loved evanescence when I saw them. And ah okay.

I just went to your YouTube, "Paper" sounds freaking awesome it sent chills down my spine and that rarely happens. That's ultimately the determining factor of all music I listen to. You have a killer voice. I also saw your dog, funny little thing.